OK ill give it up to Al Pacino for The Godfather. He was brilliant in it. Id even go so far to say that he was amazing in Dog Day Afternoon… and even Serpico was pretty good. Heat… Carlito’s Way… The Insider… all great movies. He has had his moments.
But that’s it. A handful of movies does not excuse a person from a lifetime of SHITTY… SHITTY movies. Much to my dismay… Al Pacino sucks.
I guess he never really found his way later in his career. I mean a lot of actors find other means of growing and expanding as they get older. It looks like he just pigeonholed himself into a certain role. Powerful… Intense… Relentless… Cocky… these all encompass the roles that he LOVES to play apparently. Maybe its all they studios want from him. Just act like Al Pacino… Al.
If he isn’t yelling or hollering his way through a role… then he is silent and pensive… letting us imagine what he is thinking. Whatever. I think the word that sums him up best is Ham. He’s just a hammy actor who loves to ham it up. The problem here is that he doesn’t know HOW to act like anyone else other then Al Pacino. He is an American icon and a legend. This makes him simply unbelievable in practically anything he has done since the late 70’s.
But what about Scarface Danny??? What about it? I’m sorry but that movie is one of the most overrated pieces of suck Ive ever seen. Is he really believable as a Cuban immigrant? I was unaware that Cubans wore so much eye makeup. Oh yeah and the accent. That stupid fucking accent that doesn’t sound anything near resembling a Cuban accent. The only thing that saves that movie from being a complete turd is all the fucked up sequences involving chainsaws and helicopters and machine guns and rocket launchers. Seriously though… you add any of those things to ANY movie, and its gonna kick some ass, so that’s a lame argument. Id fucking see that Traveling Pants movie if there was a chainsaw and a mountain of nose candy in it.
Scent of a Woman? Total heart string pulling bullshit. Oh he plays Al Pacino in it… but he is BLIND!!! Oh wow how different!!!! The blindness makes the character empathetic and easier for an audience to take. Sorry Al. Eat my asshole. You suck.
The thing that kills me is if you bring up the topic of Al Pacino… then TONS of people (mostly male) will go on and on about how Pacino is AMAZING!!! Wow he is like the fucking man… hes so cool and badass!!! Is he really??? Does making 6 good movies and 30 shit bombs really make a person badass? He is an actor… not a fucking green beret.
Need more examples? Maybe I can think of a few, hold on.
…And Justice For All… Cruising… Bobby Deerfield… Author! Author!… Sea of Love…Revolution… Dick Tracy… Frankie and Johnny… Two Bits… City Hall… The Devils Advocate(Awful)… Donnie Brasco(Fart)… Any Given Sunday(Weak)… S1m0ne… Insomnia… The Recruit… People I Know… Angels In America… Gigli…Two for the Money… 88 Minutes… Oceans 13… and finally Righteous Kill with 50 cent. Ugh. Gangstas love them some Scarface.
I know a lot of people like some of these movies, and that’s okay. I don’t like being the one to tell you that they suck… but they do. I’m sorry. Its not up to me, so I will end this with an open ended letter to Mr. Pacino himself.
Dear Al Pacino,
Please stop making shitty movies and make a good one again. Everyone knows youve been coasting on your star power for years now. The time has come for you to remember your calling as an actor and tap back into the talent you once had. I know you can do it. Attica!!!!
Love, Danny Anus.
p.s. Please dont ever star in a sequel or prequel to Scarface… regardless of what any asshole tells you or offers you. I would be forced to take my DVD copy of the Godfather part II and firmly place it in my rectum for public display.
9 responses so far ↓
1 Emily Riede-Scar-Zag-Face // May 30, 2008 at 9:51 am
Did you actually go see that 88 minutes one? I think I fell asleep during the commericals. Al Pacino was on Letterman recently promoting that movie and man, he has aged. I think it’s too late for him to regain control of his acting skills.
And I didn’t even know he was IN Ocean’s 13… but then again I never bothered to watch any after Ocean’s 11. I could care less.
2 Informative Matthew Zager // May 30, 2008 at 10:18 am
YES!!! someone else agrees that Scarface is ridiculously overrated… But I do love when people do those fantastic “Say hello to my miniature friend” impressions.
Scent of a Woman? what a gross name for a movie!
3 Danny Anus // May 30, 2008 at 10:37 am
Matthew… Im pretty sure he doesnt use the word miniature. He actually says “My small friend wants to tell you something!!!”
4 Is my face red Matthew Zager // May 30, 2008 at 11:23 am
What the hell was i thinking???
5 Jared: Oliver "The Kidney" Stone // May 30, 2008 at 12:20 pm
If I get all wrinkly and shout a lot, but give myself different names, can I be famous too?
However, how much do you want Al Pacino to diversify. He could end up being like Robert DeNiro and doing a few movies with Ben Stiller. Would you really want that on your Conscience?
Why Al Pacino
And not a real Cuban
To play Montana?
6 Danny Anus // May 30, 2008 at 12:23 pm
Good call. He should just hang it up and leave it be.
7 Lardy Be // May 30, 2008 at 2:27 pm
SimoneS1m0ne was fantastic! What’s your problem asshole??8 JP // May 30, 2008 at 5:40 pm
so do you think oceans 13 sucked? I liked it….Also, he was in Gigli????? Why the hell would anyone agree to be in something so obviously bad? I was one of the people that used to say he was amazing, then I thought about it and you are right…he does suck, good call…..
9 madsilver // May 30, 2008 at 6:19 pm
i dont have to guess if he sucks
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